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CowboyHippy
11-01-2007, 01:56 PM
of all the places I pour forth my life, this iseems the best suited place for this situation

while i was gone from the site for the past year or so one of the things in life I accomplished was getting in touch with some family members. when I was quite young my dad died and being that my parents were divorced the subject was never touched upon, then when i was a teen my mom died and I picked up the pieces and formed them into the life i live today. There are some relatives on my moms side whom I stay in touch with, and I knew my dad had 2 brothers, of which I knew one had died. (he used to send me letters on occasion). I set out to find my uncle Tom.

I did all sorts of internet searches, phone lookups and such and no luck. I found a 30+ year old tattered address amongst some old things and decided to give it a whirl. A simple howdy note turned into a 6 page letter. Probably a big waste since given the family's problems with heart attacks (dad and the other uncle, and grandpa as near as i remember). so for 4 weeks i looked forward to the mail delivery and hung on for a while but eventually gave up hope.

one day i got a letter, not from uncle tom but from some Lady in a town a couple hours away from me. she introduced herself, explained that she was my cousin of sorts, 1st or second, removals or whatever. she was doing this massive family tree book with pictures and stories and letters, and needed info on my side of the family. her letter detailed the points enough that I knew I was the guy she needed to se. she also mentioned that she knew to get a hold of me via my address that she got from her sister down in Illinois, who lives a few blocks from My uncle tom who had recently gotten a letter from me.

so if your still reading this you're probably waiting for something, so here's the best i got. Turns out my uncle is an odd recluse, lives in the families original house, had a good job and a couple of college degrees but when my grandparents got sick he stayed with them and stayed ever since. no phone, no tv, and i hear through the cousin system that he looks forward to getting my letters, he takes them to the cousins sister(which is his direct cousin and shows her (i usually include lots of pictures and stories) odd thing is, I have yet to hear from him. my wife kinda thinks i am crazy but every month or 2 i send a letter, usually 5 or 6 pages, pictures of whats going on, kids, dog, work, camping trips, whatever. knowing that He likes reading them is enough to keep sending them, in a way it kinda helps me cope with not having a dad, i think its some sort of lost a brother/father thing. i also found out about 2 more uncles and an aunt.

anyhoo, the dillemma. I would like to get him something for his birthday. I know very little about him (i'd love to send a dvd of the kids or something, but i think he doesnt have a tv, yet another clue that I am dealing with a very smart person) this one has me stumped. i know that when he needs cash he does odd jobs for a local farmer, and various people around town. i.e. he doesnt have a full time occupation. in addition to no tv he has no car, and i'm not sure about a bike.

he's 62, i always kinda picture him wearing non denim pants and a button up shirt, kinda like Mr Rogers. I dont want to get anything that would never get used. my best ideas are some classic books, cause i figure he sits around reading, or a nice multi tool, cause i use mine nearly daily, even though i dont picture him walking around with a sheathed instrument of survival on his belt.

so what do you get a intelligent person who leads a very simple life, whom you met once 27 years ago, and honestly never expect to hear from ever?

Unkle_John
11-01-2007, 02:04 PM
Damn, that's a tough one. I'll have to think on that.
I would ask your cousin who contacted you about him, what he likes and such. Homemade food usually is what I like.

Congrats on finding info on your family, I'm doing the same. It seams my family wasn't the greatest at keeping records.

Hippie Staff
11-01-2007, 02:09 PM
Wow..sounds like what you're doing already is probably the best gift of all. Your letters, pictures, stories...he probably loves that.

Here's an interesting one for you though..I have an uncle who is also somewhat of a recluse, and also doesn't use the phone, tv, microwave, etc.

He comes over about once every two years..if we're lucky. It's hard to get him out. Super nice guy - just a recluse. Anyway, one year I was walking by a Radio Shack, or all places, and found one of those picture frames that records and plays sound. It was about $20, had room for 2 big pictures. I put pictures of my daughter, and she babbled off a message per frame.

I've heard this is his favorite thing through his brother. Last time I saw him, he mentioned it too..he said, he will walk thru the living room sometimes and just play the message. The message is over 2 years old now, but it means a lot to him. The voice..going w/ the picture. It's low tech ..just a button to push to hear the voice.

Just a thought & how cool of you to be doing what you're doing!!

LIBRA
11-02-2007, 06:12 AM
I would surprise him with a face to face visit. Other then that I think what your doing is great and he probably loves it!! Also the homemade food idea is always a good one, who doesnt love breads or cookies??

CowboyHippy
11-03-2007, 06:39 AM
we have been discussing a face to face visit, i think it would go more like 10 hour drive one day, uncle john (my dads brother, not happyy hippie uncle john, sorry)the next day aunt barb the third, then uncle tom. it'll pretty much be a 5 or 6 day ordeal, i know a day isn't much to learn about the last 30+ years i missed as well as myfathers life. I have established lines of communication with the other uncle and the aunt, which was akward. mostly because I had never even knew they existed until earlier this year and apparently tom and john dont talk much over something that happened back in the day. fortunatley they were more than willing to talk with me and share some stories and family details.

the face to face visit most likely wont take place till spring or early summer, and his birthday is in a few weeks.

i thought about the baked goods but I'd like something kinda long term, not that we might not stick some in there too, but i do like the picture frame thing. there is a radioshack in the city, so monday after work i'll venture through the traffic and see what they have. an onlie search also yielded a usb type frame thing that has a slideshow. that might be dandy too